I started this new blog so motivated to write again – I had a bunch of stuff to blog about including our trip to Dunedin, upcoming plans for our trip to China and a whole lot of garments I’d made over the past year or so.
However, shortly after I started this blog, our girl Mia started to have bad breath and she was a bit out of sorts in general. We took her to the vets, who immediately found a tumor on her tongue and told us that Mia needed a biopsy as the tumor could be either cancer (which couldn’t be treated) or another type of growth (that was treatable).
I think from that first vet visit I kind of knew it was cancer, I was expecting the worst, but hoping for the best. It turned out the worse was true, and our girl does have cancer.
She’s been in palliative care at home with us ever since she was diagnosed, I’m glad she’s not had to spend too much time at the vets as she’s nervous and doesn’t like being around people she doesn’t know, even if they are lovely and trying to help her.
We’ve been doing all we can to make her comfortable, but the cancer is moving fast through her little body. She’s having trouble cleaning herself, its becoming a battle to get her to eat (she’s always had a really healthy appetite) and she’s drooling a lot – I guess as the cancer is in her tongue it means she can’t really control her saliva very well any more.
While she is still demanding, and sassy, and trying to get away with doing things she knows she’s not allowed to do (like walking on the dining table!) it is clear that life is becoming harder and harder for her.
When we last talked to our vet about how long Mia had, she said it could be weeks or months, last Friday she told us she would support our decision to euthanise Mia at any point and let us know that when it gets to the stage that Mia is having more bad days than good, it’s probably the time to make that decision.
Last Friday, the thought of euthanising Mia seemed a long way away, but now I know it’s pretty close – I think it will be this week. It’s hard to chose when is the best time for her, we don’t want to end her life too soon, but at the same time, it seems cruel to make her live on in pain just because we don’t want to say goodbye.
I’ve been pretty silent on here, because of trying to deal with all of this and I may be quiet for a while longer.
Hopefully, at sometime in the not too distant future, I will start to blog again, about happier things x